It's been almost a year!

WOW, my last blog post was nearly a year ago!! I can't believe it! What a year it has been!! I have a new job that I never imagined I would have, but I absolutely love it!! I am designing smartphone apps for small businesses!! So far, it's mostly restaurants, but I design and create mobile apps and submit them to the app stores in Android and Apple (iPhone/iPad)! Isn't that cool!?? I feel so super official and smart when I see the apps I made in the app stores! It's really fun!!! I've always thought I'd be happiest and most content working with children. This has nothing to do with kids, but I get to be creative and I get the challenge of making sales- it's truly exhilarating!! It's also refreshing to have a break from jobs that pull at my heartstrings so much. The jobs I've held since college were so painful at times. I was watching children and their families, suffering. And although I felt I could make a difference, it was extremely difficult. Now I'm giving my heart a break and having a wonderful time learning and having all these new experiences! (Here is some of my work- I also built the site from scratch! YEA!!)

I also have another huge, HUGE blessing in my life! I have a boyfriend. He's different than any other man I've ever dated or been interested in. He is literally everything I have prayed for!!! He is so many things I didn't even know I wanted or needed. Every other man I've dated has been "the life of the party" type of guy. My man is more on the quiet side. He has a gentle disposition and a great sense of humor! His laid back attitude certainly helps balance my passionate intensity! And his heart for the Lord and how natural it is for him to take that role of spiritual leadership in our relationship is the most beautiful thing I've ever experienced! It also doesn't hurt that he's the most attractive man I've ever seen in my life (seriously). He is tall, dark, handsome and HOT!!! I've never been so comfortable and so at peace with someone the way I am with him. He's truly a blessing, and I'm doing all I can to be the best "me" I can be and the woman God wants me to be.

A dozen roses "just because" from my amazing man!!

As for the rest of the updates... well, I'm still dealing with the chronic pelvic pain. It's honestly very difficult but I am so much mentally stronger than I was a year ago. I am handling it. I can push through it much, much better than I used to. And sleep is still a major struggle. I guess some things never change, but life is still oh, so good even with those challenges!! I am just so thankful for my life and all that I have going on right now. I am richly blessed!!

Here are a few photos from the last few months:
June:

My niece, Ellie, and I at the wedding! She's way too precious!

Me with the Bride and Groom ~ Chris and Erin got married June 25th

Me and Whitney at the wedding

July:

Sara, a friend from college and I when I visited her and her husband, Seth

August:

BFF, Nora, came for 2 weeks after we hadn't seen each other in over 3 years!!

We had a great time and I miss her always!

September:

Jordan and I when we went up to EWU to visit him and watch him play football - more on this soon!

Mom & I cheering for the EWU Eagles!

The Inferno- the nickname for Roos Field at Eastern Washington University (where Jordan plays)

October:

Hanging out with 2 of Amanda's 3 daughters. I love them!! Ashley (2)  & Addie (5)

Stay tuned, I am going to do another 30 days of Thanksgiving, starting Wednesday, October 26th. 

Christmas in Photos!!

Well, this year Christmas was so absolutely wonderful!!! The day before Christmas Eve, I got to see {my cousin} Whitney. She flew up from AZ and I was just thrilled to see her!! She also brought her boyfriend, Joey, with her. It was great to finally meet him and get to know him a little. Auntie Linda and Uncle Ronnie threw a Christmas open house that night. And it was really fun to catch up with lots of people I hadn't seen in quite awhile!!

Whit & Me at Open House

On Christmas Eve morning Mom, Whitney, Auntie Linda, Erin, Ritz, Baby Katie, Auntie Kathi and myself all went for pedicures. This is something we try to always do when Whit's in town. It was really fun!! After, I went home to finish some last minute wrapping and get ready for the evening.

Christmas Dress

We went to Candlelight Service {my favorite} at church, and then headed to RingSide for our annual Christmas Eve dinner and dessert and gifts at The Clark's.

Jordan C. & I before dinner

Christopher!

Erin {future sis in law} me, Whitney

Whitney & me and our moms

My Jordans

family photo*Jason, Jordan, Christopher

"the kids"

Kevin, my lil prince

me and baby Katie

So once we got to the Clark's from a YUMMY dinner {I had lobster and salmon with veggies and mashed potatoes} we spent the evening having dessert, exchanging gifts and playing games. We played Scattegories until 1 AM and it was SO. MUCH. FUN!! I absolutely adore my family!!

Chris and I both spent the night at my parents' house so we could all wake up together on Christmas morning. Him and I stayed up until the early morning hours {4ish} having heart to hearts. I really cherished that time with him, since it is likely the last, as he will be a newlywed next year at this time.

Christmas morning we listened to Chris read us the Christmas story from the book of Luke in the Bible before gifts. Then we opened gifts together and had a HUGE, yummy brunch together. It was good times. Then I headed home and Chris, up to WA to be with Erin's family. After I went home and showered, I went to spend some time with my friend and her baby girl. It was nice to catch up and see such dear friends on Christmas Day! Everyone else went to a dinner at some friends' of the family's house that night, but I was in too much pain to join them. Even though I wasn't feeling well, it was a truly blessed Christmas!!

Fall means... FOOTBALL!!!

So, during the fall season, one of my top priorities is being at my brothers' football games. Jason is in 7th grade at Cedar Park, and playing Sunset Youth, and Jordan is a senior at Jesuit and doing AWESOME!! It is so fun to be there to support them! I love it! Both boys' teams are undefeated so far this season.

Sunset 7-0

Jesuit 6-0

Unfortunately, Jason is done for the season as of last week. Poor guy broke some bones in his hand, but he is still faithfully supporting his teammates at practices and games! Good job, J! And Jordan is starring in the news headlines weekly as he continues to run some crazy yardage on the field (his stats are pretty impressive)! I can't wait to see how Jesuit finishes out the season. I will post some photos of the action soon!

I am definitely a proud big sister!!

GO CRUSADERS!!

*hoarse voice*

He knows...

I really just cannot figure out how to keep going after today. I know God does, and that has to be enough.

Great quote from Kirk Franklin's webpage today:

"God will either fix the situation, or use the situation to fix you." In reference to Romans 8:28. That really hit me today.

God keeps giving me this vision of a pruning process of sorts that He is doing in my life right now. I sure can see/feel the different parts of my life being stripped away! I wish I could see more of the new growth replacing it. I am so worn down... I honestly just wouldn't make it through this season without the loving, compassionate, patient and dear people he has placed in my life. I know I wouldn't.



Ugh... my heart hurts so much, but is so full at the same time.




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...

Not much has changed.... still sleeping and oh, so thankful for that! However, the pain continues to really interrupt my daily life. And I get sick of thinking about it and talking about it. Unfortunately this is just my reality right now. I just have to keep reminding myself that God is bigger. Bigger than the pain and the questions. And He does have a plan!! I don't have much time right now but I will try to write more this weekend...

Support

I have been spending a lot of time relfecting on the support system I have around me. My life is so complicated right now, but I do know that I am LOVED.

My family is awesome. Even though I'm (GASP) 28 now, my parents are still always there for me. My mom and dad are always there for me to talk about ANYTHING with. I can truly bring any topic to them and find a listening ear and a voice of wisdom- even if  I dont want it. ;)

My church family is also a huge blessing. My pastors have thousands of church members to pray for, encourage, and generally "love on," but I also know that I can count on them to encourage, challenge, and pray for/with me. They love me so much and are so supportive of me.

And my friends- I can honestly say people should be jealous of my friendships! :) I truly have friends who are some of the most loyal, true, loving and compassionate individuals. They are of varying ages and walks of life and each of them provide humor, love, laughs, wisdom, challenge and endless support to me. I pray that I offer even a fraction of the blessings to them that they are to me.

And Gary. He is amazing. I am not exactly the "dream" girlfriend right now. Some days all I can do is snuggle up to my heating pad in tears and and ask for a back rub. And he gives it. He loves me so unconditionally. He listens and comforts me and he also challenges me. He makes me want to be a better person in every way. Sometimes I don't even know how I could possibly deserve a man like him!

God has truly blessed my life. Though my body often fails me, my strength often comes from the people around me who are constantly building me up. Constantly speaking encouragement and life to me and never ceasing to challenge me to be the very best "Krystle" that God intended me to be.

~still dreaming of China~

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Prayer Needs

Hey folks,

I am in major need of prayer for how to handle my current situation. I am trying to find ways to get to the bottom of/manage this chronic illness issue. I am so unreliable at work, and knowing me, that just isn't my character, however, my body just does not allow me to work some days. The pain keeps me up many nights and clearly the surgery was not successful. My doctors have run out of options and I just really need healing. Here is where I am and what decisions need to be made:

1. I found a world class endometriosis specialist in Bend, Oregon. He can and would like to see me. I spoke with Kaiser (my current insurance) and they told me that if I write a letter to my doctor requesting her to write me a referral specifically to see him, it will cost only $10.00 rather than hundreds!! Please pray that if I should go this direction, the Lord provides the funds or the referral.

2. I am seriously contemplating short term disability. This is a difficult decision for me for various reasons:
     a- I have seen some people take major advantage of disability services and it really put a bad taste in my mouth (so to speak) about using that option.
     b- the truth is, I can work some, and I am doing so, but although I am covered with intermittent FMLA at work, it is unfair to my employers and the rest of my team to have me out so often when no one else is trained to cover my position. This has been going on for nearly 7 or 8 months now, and I know it is putting a serious strain on my department. I do not want to burn any bridges here.
     c- I do not want to take short-term disability to do nothing. I need to have a treatment plan. There has to be some direction and plan to get better. I don't think taking the time off (I am thinking 4-6 weeks), if it is not productive. As mentioned above, I do not want to take advantage of the system, I want to give my body the rest it needs and work with professionals to improve my health.
    d- I really need to hear from the Lord, first and foremost, for how to handle this situation. I want to do His will above all else. I need His direction. I am willing to continue to push through these painful days if that's what He wants. But honestly, I am feeling in my heart that I need a break. I just need confirmation of this.

Thank you, friends, for praying!! Please let me know if you want to stay in touch with my blog... I am thinking of making it private, so email me if you want to be on the list. :)

Much love!!!

May integrity and honesty protect me, because my hope is in you.

Psalm 20:20-22

Grieving

I'm really missing "the good days," when

I made plans with friends and kept my word, when I went to work over 40 hours a week and still had the energy to run and keep my body in perfect shape, having extra money to spend on cute shoes and clothes or taking a friend to lunch instead of medical bills, regular fellowship and being involved in ministry, not having to worry about how many pain meds I took yesterday, not being on a constant emotional roller coaster, thus keeping my loved ones on one too, as they walk on eggshells not knowing what's going to bring me to tears... and the list goes on and on and on... chronic illness is not fun. I try to remain hopeful, but today I just don't have it. I miss the good days.

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New Place!!!

So, as mentioned below, I got blessed with a condo and it is RAD!! I finished the majority of the move last night... here are some photos. I will add more soon! :)

(click here to see how I got this)

Bedroom/living space. this is a Murphy's bed (folds up into the wall)!

Kitchen Space

More kitchen... look at the beautiful tile behind the sink!!

More living space- a couch will go here soon. :)

When the morning light shines through it's so much easier to get out of bed!!

Living space view from bed.

Bathroom

*** by the way, there is a laundry area, it just isn't shown since there are heaps of laundry all over!! But it's so nice to have my whole place smelling of fresh laundry. :)

Kahneeta!!

This past weekend Gary took me to Kahneeta! It was so much fun! The pool was SUPER WARM and it really reminded me of my childhood being in the pool all summer long! I miss swimming! :)

He's not done with me yet!! :)

SO this morning I learned that God definitely has a purpose for my life and (EEEK), it has not been fulfilled yet! I know this because I am pretty sure I used up one of my "many lives." After what I've been through in the past 5 or 6 years sometimes I think I am like a cat. Nine lives. Seriously. So anyway, I knocked another one off last night when I decided to put some rice in a pot and cover it on low for my lunch at work today. I got back in bed afterwards expecting that I would take it off the burner while I was up all night with my typical insomnia. I didn't expect that at 7:30 AM when I entered my kitchen it would STILL BE COOKING!!! I actually fell asleep last night (Praise the LORD!!!), and LEFT THE STOVE ON for at least 8 hours!!! Yikes!! So, once again, the Lord lets me know that He's not done with me yet! Haha... or maybe that's just my way of explaining my wacky flakiness. :) Either way, thank you, Jesus, for saving me from the could-have-been-apartment-up-in-flames-thus-no-more-Krystle!!

P.S. If you were wondering, the pot isn't ruined and NOTHING is damaged! Darn, I am so blessed!!

No Matter What, I am BLESSED!!

In the wake of a family tradgedy (the death of my uncle) and chronic illness, I remain full of hope. I know the Lord has some great plans, and I know He is still providing for me!

With working less and lots of medical bills pouring in, the past few months have been financially straining to say the least. But God had a plan for that. He has sent some special guardian angels my way who have helped and of course, my amazing parents. I must highlight the living situation though! I moved just 11 months ago into the place that I saw myself living in long-term (unless of course, I moved to China). It is charming and has a perfect location for me. I adore it. But as I have been trying to navigate finances I have been praying for how I would continue to support myself and live on my own. Well, a family we are close to had bought a condo downtown near PSU for their daughter last winter. She has been lonely living there, so she moved a couple weeks ago. They really didn't want to sell it, but they also were not interested in renting to a stranger. They told my dad that they were looking for someone and he called me, and we all got together so I could view it. Oh my gosh, it is beautiful!! They have put brand new hardwood floors, new granite countertops and all new appliances inside. I absolutely love it! On top of that, I am saving money by living there!! They just want to break even. They are also allowing me to move in gradually throughout August for FREE!!! Yay!! So, as much as I seriously despise moving, it is such a blessing that I am really going to try not to complain in the process.

Oh, Jesus loves me!! :)

Ups and Downs...

Well, after having a couple of "good days" last week I am feeling like I am back to square one of just being ill and in pain. The past 6 or so months have me so exhausted. Just getting through 4-8 hours at work leaves me breathless. It makes me sad to get home, collapse into my bed and watch my phone ring with sweet friends of mine who I just don't have the energy to speak with. I am trying to connect more because I know the isolation isn't helpful, but at times I just can't find the energy to form sentences. I am so grateful for the wonderful people in my life. They make me smile. My best friend, Nora, who is busy in international law school has called me each night to check in this week, my friend Katie, who stops by if I cannot go out, and just all of my friends who are constantly sending prayers and love my way. Also, the pastors at church who call or email and have just been supportive in miraculous ways. This week I have found myself reflecting on my dreams of going to China. I am trying not to let myself feel that those dreams will never realize, but I am so glad the Lord put the brakes on those plans when He did! I can't imagine being in such a foreign place trying to navigate to wellness!! Not to mention I wouldn't be with Gary either- who, by the way, has also been wonderful! He is so encouraging and sweet. He is taking me on a getaway next weekend. I cannot wait. No matter how much pain I am in, I can't cancel 2 days of laying on a warm beach!! Oh, I love him and I'm already so excited to go!! Back to work now...

It's me, it's me!!

Well, it has been a loooooong few months. Chronic pain, surgery, medical procedures, emergency department visits and a hospital stay... and after all, still some big question marks as to what exactly is going on within my body. All aspects of life have changed. I'm (sadly) quite sedentary and emotional and just not the same Krystle that I know and everyone else is familiar with. Over the past week with some (GI) medication changes and certainly God's grace, I am having days that include glimpses of me and pain-free moments that have turned to hours. And last week i actually worked 35 hours! Amazing! In some ways that makes me very sad, but it is HUGE compared to what I have (not) been working before that. And today was beautiful. I woke with minimal pain and lots of energy-Great energy! I woke before my alarm and actually took time to look nice and make my bed and clean and just felt so much like the routine I lived by daily months ago. Today I was back. I was cheerful, energetic, tenacious, hard-working, Krystle Dionne Thornon. I hope it lasts...

Thank you, Lord, for giving me wellness today.

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Dreams, Bellies, and Bikinis

OK, so one of my sweet friends is expecting a baby in just a couple of months and she is just the cutest person ever even before she was pregnant so now she's just beyond words ADORABLE!!! Anyway, many people know that one thing I seriously dream about, daydream of, obsess over and CANNOT WAIT for is to one day wear a bikini swimsuit while 6-9 months pregnant. I seriously cannot even put into words how badly I want to ROCK THAT BELLY! So anyway, today we were talking about our weekend and she told me that she wore a bikini this weekend!!!! I cannot describe the jealousy I have. Haha. Seriously though, that made my day!!! The even more amazing thing is, she had been trying to get pregnant for quite awhile and it wasn't happening. Her and her hubby had been really praying and trying to trust God's timing for it. I had been praying too. Constantly praying that God would give them peace and give her health and that His timing would show to be perfect in this whole situation. And HE DID!! She's pregnant now, and just in time to have a big 'ole beautiful belly for the world to see all summer long!!!

Dreams really do come true!! :)

ugh.

I don't have much new to report right now. Nothing happily exciting anyway. I had my surgery a month ago today and I remain in quite a bit of pain and missing out on a lot of life. I am still searching for answers and trying to keep my spirits up but truly, it is just plain hard. I do feel blessed that through this my employer has been so gracious as to let me keep my job, but I am sure their patience is running thin. So I am pushing my body as much as possible to be there and trying my best to be present and delightful in my relationships, but that is probably lacking at this point too.

here's to more exciting posts and i am hoping for better days VERY SOON!

Update

Well, the pain is still here and quite real. Once I have more information from my doctor I will post the details. There will be a surgery soon though. I am just continuing to truck along and counting my blessings. At this point I have to be on some pretty strong pain meds basically all the time in order to have the pain at a level I can tolerate. That is a bummer and so is laying in bed most of the time. However, I have so many wonderful people in my life whom I can depend on. Last week my parents were out of town and so was Gary. The fam got home yesterday and Gary gets home tonight, but I had friends stopping by last week and my Auntie Linda took me to appointments and brought me food. It was so sweet. I am also SO GRATEFUL for how gracious my employers have been. It really shows me how much God loves me and is finding favor in me throughout this season of time. Work has allowed me to login remotely and get paid for whatever hours I am able to work from home. I am stopping into the office when possible to do work that can only be completed in my office. Also, on Tuesday my supervisor and I will be meeting with a new woman who will take on some of my duties while I am recovering from surgery. I continue to think about how blessed I am to be able to do this and save my job. I could have easily lost my job two months ago when I was constantly leaving early and calling in sick when this pain was not quite as bad as it is now and we had no idea where it was coming from. Then I would be in a situation with no medical insurance! Yikes!! Oh, God love me. I don't deserve it but that's the beauty of grace.

That's pretty much all I've got for now!

Much love.

Running and stuff...

I thought I would write today and catch up on what's been going on recently. I will add photos soon. :)

SO, bad news first; some know about the health issues I have been facing recently. Unfortunately I continue to be in chronic pain at least a few days a week. I am working with different specialists and a PT, and hoping to see some results soon! It has been difficult because pelvic pain is so "invisible." It is not something that others' notice just by being around me, so although I take it seriously because I can feel it, it has been lonely at times because when I am home from work or not feeling up to going out I don't know that others quite get it. With that said, I am still blessed to have such wonderful loved ones who are there for me whether they can feel it or not! :)

On the brighter side, I am blessed to have a job that has granted me loads and loads of grace for missing work!! I can't imagine it much better. Also, my boyfriend is just super rad and we are still going strong.

The Shamrock Run was yesterday, and I have not ran in 6 whole weeks due to my health status. Even though I have talked about it, in the back of my mind I was uncertain if I would make it to the race, pending my pain level that morning. Well, awesome news- I made it!!! Andrea and I were running late, so we ran across downtown from my apartment with no breakfast or water with minutes to spare before the 8k! We ended up kicking some major butt, and finished in just over 45 minutes!!! YAY!!! I am still on a high from it! I am so very thankful that I was able to make it, and even more that my body held up fabulously and I was able to really perform. Andrea and I make an awesome team encouraging and challenging each other the whole way! I must admit, the first couple of miles were rough... I had quite the potty mouth going up the hills, but we made it and ran the last mile as fast as we could... it was great weaving through people on the last stretch! I LOVED IT!!!

Praise Reports!

Soooo, guess who is sleeping completely medication-free, all through the night and waking rested. Yep, that would be yours truly!!! I guess it's really only been a couple of nights but I am beyond hopeful that it will continue! It has been at least 5 years since I have slept without meds! PRAISE THE LORD!!!
Wooohooo!!!

Oh, and some of you know about my struggle with chronic pelvic pain. Lately it has been continuous and debilitating. I am currenlty on day 3 of pain less than a level 5 constantly!!! Holla!!! :)

Great Weekend!!!

So this weekend Gary and I took a little trip to the beach before we went to one of his soccer games in Albany. We went to Lincoln City and it was absolutely beautiful!! I can barely find the words to describe it, so I will post some photos. :)

Self portrait in the sun!

Not only was the beach gorgeous, but it was super fun for Gary and I to take some time away from everything and just enjoy each other's company and the beauty that surrounded us on the coast. He is such a good guy to know just when I (we) need a break from mundane life. I was all smiles returning to work Monday. :)

I had a good time playing around like a lil kid :)

Look at those blue eyes... who would have imagined!??

Loving him!